A couple of weeks ago, I was walking to the office from the metro, when I saw a tiny little creature sprawled on the sidewalk next to a tall tree in LaFayette Park. It was a tiny black squirrel baby, and he was teetering around on his tiny little squirrel legs, apparently still too young to run around. I assessed he had fallen out of the tree, or was pushed out by his siblings.
He stumbled over to me and just sat in front of me.
I bent down to stroke his soft little back, and he didn’t run away.
I wasn’t sure what to do, so I called DC animal control, because I was afraid inattentive humans, whether walking with their noses in their phones or riding their bikes would run the tiny little guy over. The nice man on the other end of the line was probably amused at my near-panicked concern about this teeny creature, and told me to pick him up and place him near the tree out of the way of pedestrians and bikes. (Yes, I assumed the squirrel’s gender, and in my head I named him George)
While I was on the phone with animal control, George decided to clumsily climb onto my foot and play with the buckle on my shoe! George was obviously a very brave baby squirrel.
After hanging up with animal control, I scooped George up into my hands and carried him to the tree, away from uncaring humans and speeding bicyclists. George sat in my cupped hands and made little squeaky squirrel noises. He sniffed me and may have taken a tiny little nibble of my thumb. He didn’t break the skin; I think he was just trying to figure out what I was. I looked closely at George’s tiny little face, resisted the urge to take him to the office with me wrapped in my suit jacket, and placed him next to the tree.
George was a black squirrel, or an eastern fox squirrel, apparently native to eastern and southeastern United States.
I never considered George’s color, nor what he ate. I thought about bringing him some nuts. I know we have all kinds of squirrels in LaFayette Park, including ginger, grey, and black ones. He looks grey-ish in this photo, but he actually was a little black critter.
But apparently, I should have noticed, because eastern fox squirrels are ostensibly the victims of RACISM! The media is apparently biased against black squirrels!
How do I know this? Because some bored, attention-seeking, perpetually aggrieved sow of an “associate professor” (emphasis mine) at California State Polytechnic University says so, and has done an entire research paper on the topic! No, I’m not kidding. I wish I was. Get a load at this word salad.
Drawing on feminist food studies and feminist posthumanist theories of intersectionality and performativity, this article draws out the implications of a feminist posthumanist politics of consumption for animal geography and feminist geography.
By juxtaposing feminist posthumanist theories and feminist food studies scholarship this article demonstrates how eastern fox squirrels: (1) are subjected to gendered, racialized, and speciesist thinking as a result of their feeding/eating practices, their unique and unfixed spatial arrangements in the greater Los Angeles region, and the western, modernist human frame through which humans interpret these actions (Deckha 2012; Hovorka 2015; Lloro-Bidart 2016) and (2) ontologically defy society’s boundedness as they demand the freedom to eat whatever they choose in the city.
This is how far the Covenant of the Chafed Cunt is willing to dig to find offense, racism, marginalization, and other “evidence” of just how depraved our society is. This “professor” dug through 18 months’ worth of news articles, blogs, government publications, and other sources to find evidence for her contention that eastern fox squirrels are the victims of RAAAAACISM in California, when viewed through the feminist lens. She claims that because most of the popular news articles maligned these little guys for their feeding habits, she figured she’d focus her lens of feminist rage on this particular issue.
…eastern fox squirrels’ consumption of bird eggs and baby birds and mammals has similarly made them the target of conservationists in southern CA. In this case, instead of ‘concerns about cruelty’ related to the killing of animals for food becoming ‘a vehicle for ethnocentrism and even imperialism,’ (Kim 2015, 83), such concerns become a vehicle for conservationists to displace their own concerns about species loss in the greater Los Angeles region onto the eastern fox squirrel.
These connections between the eastern fox squirrel’s eating of ‘everything’ and the fecundity of the [nonnative] squirrel resonate with what Subramaniam calls the ‘oversexed female’ narrative, where ‘[f]oreign women are typically associated with superfertility – reproduction gone amuck’ (2001, 31).
In other words, this perpetually aggrieved, constantly searching for offense, word vomit spewing bobblehead is claiming her funhouse mirror feminist telescope is showing her that poor eastern fox squirrels are being discriminated against on the West Coast.
In the process she disgorges SJW buzzwords such as “intersectionality,” “feminism,” “power,” “ethnocentrism,” and “resistance” in order to show how our views of fat women color Angelinos’ views of darker squirrels… because they’re gendered, racialized, and speciesist… or something.
Really. Is this freak pickle getting paid to spew this shit?
Interesting note: I wanted to see what else this creature has spewed, but her social media and her website have all mysteriously disappeared.
I can’t even begin to describe the drama that has been unfolding on Facebook these past couple of days!
About half my friends are either Republican or Libertarian. The other half is either liberal or downright communist. Yes, I’m friends with all kinds of people, and generally we get along just fine despite our political differences.
There are some who act like adults. No, they’re not happy with the election results, but they’re engaging with their conservative friends to understand why the results were what they were. They’re asking questions. They’re engaging in some introspection. They’re acting like adults.
“Trump’s victory is proof that our election system is not rigged. He won fairly – and in spite of significant disadvantages,” said one friend.
Another honestly wanted to know WHAT the appeal was, needing a way to see Trump as more than just “Hitler rising to power.” (And yes, I pointed out the errors in reasoning.)
I sat my folks down yesterday and explained to them that despite being unhappy with the election results, there will be times in their government careers when they will work for an administration whose head they did not vote for. I explained to them that they were the brightest, most dedicated group of professionals I have ever had the honor of working with and leading – that they care more about what they do and the future and security of our country than any government employees I’ve ever seen! I told them they were dedicated and brilliant, and that what they do when the transition team lands Monday will help set the tone for the relationship this administration has with our community for what could be as long as eight years.
They took my speech to heart, because they’re adults.
On the other side of the spectrum, we have the drama queens who sniveled and whined about the “dark times.”
“What will we tell our daughters?”
“My children are terrified!”
“My daughter spent the night in tears last night!”
“We are returning to an era of hate and racism!”
“Homophobia! My gay daughter cried all day!”
“My trans friend wants to commit suicide!”
They refuse to even consider that perhaps listening to the other side every once in a while is wise, and that maybe their friends aren’t the RACISTHOMOPHOBICMISOGYNIST monsters they believe all Trump supporters to be.
There are calls for revolution (yeah, most of you assholes hate guns, so good luck with that), violence, assassinations, and murder.
Some are actually acting on it!
If you need proof of the burning stupid, read Wednesday night’s post.
The most heartbreaking of the lot, however are the stories about the children.
And of course, the media is flogging those like a cheap dominatrix.
With ardent support from hysterical parents, the narrative is now that Trump supporters hate Mexican children, and will send them back to Mexico in cattle cars.
“What will I tell my children?”
“I’m scared for my children!”
“My children are frightened!”
You know why they’re frightened?
Because in your froth-flecked zeal to paint Trump and his supporters as odious as possible, you’ve scared the shit out of them!
Because, some among you are so desperate to promote the “racism” message, you go as far as to file false reports to police about evil Trump supporters attacking your Muslimness!
A Muslim woman in Louisiana who told police she was attacked with a metal object and robbed of her headscarf and wallet by two men wearing Donald Trump clothing just hours after Trump was elected president admitted to police today that she made it up, Lafayette police told ABC News.
You tell them lies about your fellow Americans.
You whip them into a panic about their future.
You froth and despair about the future of our nation because someone you don’t like got elected and tell your children how awful things are, instead of simply telling them that in their lifetimes there will be times when someone for whom they did not vote will become president.
You irrationally demand impeachment and the end to the electoral college, because someone you did not support won the election!
You know why your children are scared, you whining ignorami? Because YOU are scaring them. Yes. You.
It’s YOUR refusal to be a grownup and a parent and provide rational guidance rather than foolish histrionics that is scaring them, and will eventually facilitate their development into swooning members of participation trophy-hoarding Generation Cupcake!
It’s YOUR failure as a parent and as a role model that’s frightening them, and YOUR refusal to provide objective direction that’s giving them angst, because apparently you’d rather impose your irrational hatred of your fellow Americans on them than guide them through challenging times.
It’s YOUR inability to provide impartial, balanced narrative, because you’re so busy projecting your utter hatred, that is scaring your gay kids, who thanks to your histrionics about Trump’s alleged “homophobia and transphobia,” don’t even know that despite Trump’s significant faults, he was vocal in his support of transgender individuals using whatever bathrooms they felt appropriate during a time when the issue was at its contentious height, and put his money where his mouth was.
It’s YOUR inability to discuss real issues, rather than focus on vagina politics, it’s YOUR ineptitude at objectivity and failure to admit that it wasn’t sexism or misogyny that tanked Hillary Clinton, but rather the fact that she was a venal, corrupt, entitled, dishonest cheater who looked down her nose for years at the same people who handed Trump his victory.
If you want to know why your children are scared, upset, and angry, you have only to look in the mirror and your failure to adult as the reason.
Trump is hardly the perfect candidate. He wasn’t even a good candidate! I will even go as far as to say that he was a terrible candidate, and I have said so often on this site.
But you know what? He won. He will be President. And it’s your duty as a parent to make your kids understand what the duties and limitations of the office are, what they must do and learn to work hard and help a victory next time, if that’s what they want, and that there will be people in this country who have different opinions from you – and their voices count just as much as yours. Teach them how government works to allay their irrational fears – after you learn it yourselves.
Acting like a petulant child in front of your kids breeds just the type of screeching, entitled, safe-space seeking Snowflakes whose mercenary attempts to shut down and destroy the opposition’s right to a voice, instead of engaging them (ostensibly because life is hard when you’re offended by everything) ensured the backlash that resulted in a Trump presidency.
As Barack Obama told Republicans a few years back, he won. “Deal with it.”
And stop scaring your kids!
…and your news and social media feeds are filled with: TRUMP, KGB (no, it doesn’t fucking exist anymore – try FSB, assholes!), HILLARY, WIENER, HUMA, WEINER, RUSSIANS, PUTIN, WIENER, MORE WEINER, and all you really want to do is stab yourself in the eyeballs rather than see another photo of Anthony Weiner’s half naked torso and tales of his schlong, you almost give up on blogging until after this accursed election happens.
And then you run across this, which partially explains why out of 300 million people in this country, we wind up with the most awful, the most venal, the most narcissistic, the most corrupt candidates for president possible (although I shouldn’t say “the most,” because at the rate we’re going, there’s always the possibility that el Chapo will gain U.S. citizenship and will run for President in 2020 and win).
See, here’s what happened.
This greasy cock monkey was at a Trump rally, and was recorded screaming “JEW-S-A” when everyone was chanting “U-S-A” to demonstrate their love for our country.
The left, of course, glommed onto this slovenly bit of residue that looks like he gelled his hair with a bit of leftover KY after fucking several siblings, as typical of Trump voters – and probably conservatives writ large.
But never fear. There’s no racism or Jew hatred here!
George Lindell claims he wasn’t yelling “JEW-S-A,” as the liberal media accuses him of doing. No, he was yelling “U-S-A” but in Spanish.
I. Shit. You. Not.
“Everybody is saying I’m a racist because I was saying ‘Jew S.A,'” Lindell said during an interview on Monday. “It has nothing to do with the Jews. I was speaking Spanish.”
Lindell said he is from Phoenix and Phoenix is a multi-cultural society with a lot of Spanish-speaking people.
“When you pronounce ‘USA’ in Spanish it sounds like ‘Jew S. A.,'” Lindell said “I like the sound of it — ‘Jew S.A’ — it’s a lot better than ‘USA’ which is very boring. We need to integrate the Spanish lingo, the Spanish language into our society.”
Don’t you worry, ese! I was just trying to sound like them Messicans! I wasn’t makin fun of them Jooos or anything! And I love them blacks too!
He seems nice!
Not that it matters at this late stage, because one of these douchecus candidati will wind up in the White House, but maybe the GOP ought to try and trot out the more intelligent of the Trump supporter lot – you know…
…those who speak coherent English, and those who sound like they may have finished high school at the very least, so that the rest of American conservatives aren’t lumped in with this inbred fuckwit.
We know there are intelligent, well-spoken people out there who do support the GOP nominee (vice the shit-flinging Trumpanzees). Could we get those out in the public eye at the very least?
Because I loved DareDevil and Jessica Jones, I decided it was time to binge watch Marvel’s Luke Cage on Netflix. I liked the character a lot on Jessica Jones, and yes, it does help that Mike Colter is easy on the eyes and has a voice like butter. But most of all, I liked the plot, the character development, and the terrific acting by a very talented cast, including the always amazing Rosario Dawson, the shining Mahershala Ali (whom you may remember as Remy on House of Cards), who struck a beautiful balance as Cottonmouth between a thug and an almost sympathetic figure, and the legendary Alfre Woodard.
There’s action. There’s adventure. There’s dark and light. And there’s pretty damn good music too!
So of course, it would stand to reason that both the dumbasses on the right and the left can’t leave well enough alone.
For the record, not a single friend I have who has seen this show (and there are quite a few) – black or white – has gotten butthurt about diversity, or lack thereof, in the series.
Maybe I live in a warm, fuzzy cocoon, or maybe the dumbasses on both sides are just that shrill, that they immediately need to draw attention to their pathetic dumbassery, and simply can’t allow themselves or others to enjoy the show for what it is – a well written, well acted show.
No, seriously WHY?
The dumbassery is twofold here. It’s like when your very Jewish parents find out your boss’ last name and proceed to ask whether he’s Jewish, because you know… the name sounds Jewish.
WHO FUCKING CARES!!!!????
Once again I remind people – it’s a well acted, well written, interesting, fun show. Why does it matter how many “POCs” there are?
And why is it that this @EscapeVelo retard is incapable of enjoying a well-done show if it doesn’t have white people in it?
I would submit that most of us white people couldn’t give less of a smelly, brown trout about what color most of the characters are, but leave it to some (people of color) to find the few dick weasels (where else – Twitter!) who are whining about reverse racism and crow about it like they’ve found that elusive Holy Grail of Shitbaggery they’ve desperately sought as proof that racism is pervasive, and they’ve somehow achieved victory over the pervasive evil, because the show is… uh… BLACK!
“HEY, LOOK AT THIS! WE’VE FOUND PROOF OF RACISM, AND WE’VE WON OVER IT, BECAUSE THE SHOW IS BLACK!”
Netflix’s new Marvel Universe show, Luke Cage, is black. It’s blackity black black on a tray of black a$$ blackness. While this is incredibly awesome for most of us, there are some (white) people who are bothered by the show’s blackness. Sorry not sorry.
“Blackity black black on a tray of black a$$ blackness.” Really? How original.
I note no actual commentary on the quality of the show, the characters, the acting, or the writing. I suspect the writers of this particular load of spew are more interested in sticking it to whitey than they are about a quality show that just happens to feature black characters. I base my assessment on the title of this incredibly moronic piece: Let’s Laugh At The White People Who Are Mad At How Black ‘Luke Cage’ Is.
It’s idiots on both sides that perpetuate that us vs. them mentality. From the felching ass burps who can’t get over the fact that a show doesn’t feature a sufficient amount of white characters is doing well to the cackling mental midgets who crow about the color of the characters and don’t care about much else.
It’s almost amusing that #LukeCage is being criticized as “too Black”. I watched it because of its unapologetic Blackness.
— Jon of the Dead 👻 (@jontsuei) October 4, 2016
Gee. I watched it because I enjoy the characters and the story. I guess I’m just not virtue signally enough.
By the way – if you want to take a look at what the us vs. them mentality really looks like, go to Twitter and search #LukeCage racism. I saw a couple of ignorami claiming the show was somehow racist, but the majority of the Tweets were, in fact, coming from blacks noting how ridiculous the accusations of the show being “too black” are, as if these accusations were prevalent, but not actually quoting these alleged racist tweets, which makes me assess that perhaps the media has glommed on to a few shitbags who do exist and has exploited them into a full-blown story arc of racism and hatred for people to react to.
I’m saddened by both sides. It seems we can’t make a step without focusing on our differences. We can’t appreciate a good piece of TV – which is so damn rare nowadays – without zooming in on superficial crap like the amount of melanin in the character’s skin. It can’t just be a quality piece of entertainment. It has to be an us vs. them scenario, even in something as inconsequential as a television show.
And if you want to see it in comment form, you can take a look here.
They are only upset because this show was trending for days on Twitter. And alot [sic.] of blacks were talking about it. I can care less [sic.] about their tears. They have plenty of shows, movies, damn near everything. So i can care less [sic.]. Let them whine and cry about it all day long.
For the record, I agree with this guy.
why ya’ll making #lukecage political? leave my show alone
— DevTony Production (@devtonypro) October 4, 2016