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Tag Archives: Huffington Post

So Much DERP!

Well, here it is – the dumbest thing I’ve read all day. It’s the runaway winner and gold medalist in the idiot olympics. It’s weapons-grade moronic. It would be a crime not to ridicule it.

Some fuckwitted cock smoker has broken my brain today with his utter drain bamaged dumbshittery. Before I launch into analysis of what passes for intelligent discourse on the left this day, let’s define a few terms, shall we?

TreasonTreason against the United States, shall consist only in levying War against them, or in adhering to their Enemies, giving them Aid and Comfort. No Person shall be convicted of Treason unless on the Testimony of two Witnesses to the same overt Act, or on Confession in open Court.

Collusion: secret agreement or cooperation especially for an illegal or deceitful purpose.

Obstruction of justice: Obstruction of justice is defined in the omnibus clause of 18 U.S.C. § 1503, which provides that “whoever . . . . corruptly or by threats or force, or by any threatening letter or communication, influences, obstructs, or impedes, or endeavors to influence, obstruct, or impede, the due administration of justice, shall be (guilty of an offense).”

Act of war: An act of war is an action by one country against another with an intention to provoke a war or an action that occurs during a declared war or armed conflict between military forces of any origin.

High treason: Treason against a sovereign or state. We don’t have that in our legal code. We have treason, which I defined above, and which is punishable by death. There have been five people in total executed for treason against the United States in our history: Moses Dunbar (1777), David Farnsworth (1778), Herbert Hans Haupt (1942), Thomas Hickey (1776), and William Bruce Mumford (1862).

Morality: principles concerning the distinction between right and wrong or good and bad behavior.

This creature Jason Fuller – it would be a stretch to call him a writer (hell, I’m not even sure he’s a homo sapien) – has penned a column for the HuffPost that is so filled with absolute ass-fucking absurdity, that I would be remiss in my duties if I didn’t ridicule him. Fuller claims that it’s not enough to impeach Donald Trump. America must be “redeemed” by trying him for treason and executing him.

Yeah, I know. I had to read that one a few times, because it’s so mindnumbingly fucktarded, it was actually painful.

In just these short few months, Donald Trump has managed to gut environmental protections; sign two executive orders attempting to implement a travel ban on Muslim-majority countries; fire the former head of the FBI specifically for investigating the Trump campaign ties to Russia; isolate the United States from much of the rest of the world; and submit a budget which would eviscerate social programs designed to help the worst off among us. And these are just the things I can think of off the top of my head, without even conducting a search.

I’m assuming that by “gut environmental protections” this gelatinous lump is referring to the Paris Climate Agreement that has absolutely no enforcement authority, because participation is voluntary, that the most egregious polluters in the world almost certainly will ignore, but it’s great messaging for them to sign, which doesn’t even mandate changes to state laws, and which most companies don’t need to be environmentally conscious, because green technologies have become less expensive, more effective, and more desired by shareholders these days and are already being used.

Yeah, that’s some high treason right there, shit guzzler!

Travel ban on Muslim-majority countries… Oh, you mean like Indonesia, which has nearly a 90 percent Muslim majority? Nope.

Pakistan, which is 96 percent Muslim? Nope.

Bangladesh, Turkey, or Egypt which are all more than 90 percent Muslim? Nope, not those either.

Saudi Arabia, right? I mean, they’re 100 percent Muslim. Surely, travelers from that country – from where the majority of the 9/11 hijackers came – would be banned from the United States!

Uhhhhh… no.

Yeah, perhaps it’s time for Fuller to shut his cakehole, but unfortunately, he goes on.

Submitting a budget Fuller didn’t like is apparently equivalent to treason. Firing the FBI Director, which was no-doubt a dick move, but which he had the authority to do, and which did nothing to stop the investigation into Russia, but rather was followed by the appointment of a special prosecutor, is also treasonous, according to this incoherent moist, brown, oily, malodorous stain on the underwear of humanity.

These are all the things he can think of off the top of his pointy little head. Not a great accomplishment, monkey.

There is very little doubt left that Trump and his team colluded with members of the Russian government to try and rig the election in his favor, even if the Russians did not outright hack the voting process itself; while we may not yet have 100% incontrovertible proof of their collusion, the administration’s attempts to hide previous contacts with the Russians, their willingness to blatantly lie about their communications, and the contents of Trump’s meetings with former FBI director Comey are all incriminating on their own. And Trump’s decision to fire Comey specifically to hamper that investigation is obstruction of justice, no matter what spin he or anyone else puts upon it.

Trump and his team colluded with the Russians! But we don’t have proof that they did! But Comey said Trump wasn’t under investigation! But he got fired! But Comey’s testimony didn’t reveal collusion! But we know there was collusion! Because DERP!

And the interference of the Russian government to circumvent our democratic procedures for electing the President of the United States is an act of war. There is no other way to characterize it; this was an all-out attack by the government of Russia on our democratic process, the very foundation of our country. This elevates Trump’s simple obstruction of justice to high treason under the Constitution.

Note the definition of “act of war” above, turnip. Also note, as I explained several times on this site, there has been no evidence that the Russian hacking altered votes in any way. They probed our states’ election systems for vulnerabilities via hacking before the election took place. They openly admitted to preferring one candidate over another. They launched an elaborate information operations campaign, which has been described as “information warfare.” But an “act of war” is not a definition that fits.

We can also argue that Trump’s continued insistence on a travel ban — he’s not even disguising his intent anymore, based on his recent tweets — serves the purpose of assisting ISIS, which is arguably the nation’s biggest enemy right now. Trump’s campaign rhetoric and subsequent travel ban orders against the Muslim population serve as a valuable recruitment tool for the Islamic State by giving them credibility. ISIS’ whole narrative is that Western powers seek to destroy Islam; Trump’s willingness to wage what amounts to a constitutional jihad against all of Islam makes their entire case for them…

That Trump fails to recognize how much he is assisting ISIS with his rhetoric — or simply does not care — is a subject for debate, but it is a fact which he cannot dispute. By choosing to ignore this fact, he is aiding the greatest foreign adversary in the modern world and therefore committing another act of treason.

You can certainly argue it, turnip, but that that doesn’t make it in any way true. A temporary travel restriction on six countries that even the Obama Administration saw as a specific threat – enough to impose travel restrictions on for several months – is certainly not giving aid and comfort to the enemy or adhering to them in any way, which before the Constitution was adopted was pretty clearly defined in the treason statute of Pennsylvania as “to aid and assist any enemy… by joining the armies of the enemy, or by enlisting, or procuring, or persuading others to enlist for that purpose; or by furnishing such enemies with arms or ammunition, provision, or any other article or articles, for their aid or comfort, or by carrying on a traitorous correspondence with them.”

In other words, turnip, acting to secure America’s borders – regardless of whether or not you agree that it will protect our country, and regardless of whether or not it actually assists ISIS (and quoting a CNN story that cites a British scholar who claims it will boost recruitment and help ISIS is not the same as definitive proof that it has, doorknob) – does not qualify under the definition of actively providing aid and comfort to the enemy.

This same argument also applies to top-ranking White House and Republican aides, including — but likely not limited to — Steve Bannon, Kellyanne Conway, Mitch McConnell, Paul Ryan, and Vice President Pence. While they may not be participating quite as directly as Trump himself, the fact that they support his agenda and are helping to protect him means that they are accessories and are thus also committing acts of treason. All must face justice.

Well, isn’t that precious? Any one who disagrees with this derptastic shit nugget’s frothing indictment of Trump’s actions must be tried for treason and executed. Got that, boys and girls? Here’s your unhinged progtard, who wants to kill anyone who supports Trump’s policies.

The rest of the piece is at about the same level of derp as the part I already fisked. Lots of incoherent rambling and an insistence that Trump and anyone who supports him must be tried for treason – without actually providing any evidence of collusion, obstruction of justice, or “high treason,” whatever the hell that is, and however the hell it differs from regular ole, garden variety treason – and an immediate call for executions. Because Jason Fuller is an expert on treason, you see, working a self-admitted low wage job somewhere in a small American town, his assumption of guilt based on his own froth flecked unhingeary must inevitably end in death for all involved.

After an unhinged Bernie Bro yesterday decided to attempt political assassination, the site pulled Fuller’s tardsome rant, which is why I linked to a Google cached version of it. If I have to suffer through the fucktardulous derpery, so do you!

In a spectacular show of tone deafness, Fuller claims the only way to restore morality to America is to murder those with whose politics he disagrees after trying them for treason!

This is the path America is on.

This is our current trajectory.

Antifa retards trying to silence dissenting voices by throwing projectiles and Molotov cocktails and threatening political opposition. Nuclear-grade fucktard Bernie supporters trying to assassinate politicians with whom they disagree.” Delusional monkeys with keyboards claiming that the only way to make America moral again is to kill the President, Vice President, and Congressional leaders who support the President’s agenda, presenting not even a shred of coherent evidence to support his insane claims of treason. Celebricunts traumatizing the President’s kid while culturally appropriating ISIS’ trademark beheading on the national stage.

These people want to kill you. I say this as someone who was firmly in the #NeverTrump camp during the election. I say this as someone who many times disagrees with this administration’s policies. I say this as someone who sees what is going on in this nation and carries an extra magazine or two for her M1911 anywhere she goes these days.

Because these people want to kill you. They want a civil war. They proudly admit to be preparing for it.

And with cretins like this Fuller tardzilla fanning the flames of violence, they’re likely to get it.

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Octomom loves ObamaCare

Not satisfied with turning her reproductive giblets into a clown car, shitting out 14 fuck trophies she couldn’t afford and then neglecting them, the attention whore known as Octomom has made a porn video in which she pleasures herself.

I’ll wait for you to finish vomiting. Go ahead.

While I’m sure that there are probably a handful of creeps living in their moms’ basements who will rub one (or more) out to this crazy twat’s bid for yet more attention, her absurd pleas for relevance are getting really old. She can’t afford to actually care for her crotchfruit, so she has famously neglected them, forcing them to live in squalor and squat outside like animals.  Neglect = news.

She filed for bankruptcy, because somehow she could afford to shit out 14 pups through in-vitro, but apparently had no marketable skills to actually take are of them. Bankruptcy = news.

Apparently the only part of her body that is actually capable of making money is her vajayjay, so she’s using her already overused plumbing to make porn movies.  Masturbation when you’re Octomom = news.

I’ll wait for you to finish yet another round of regurgitation. Go ahead.

So this worthless cuntwart, who somehow managed to convince a doctor to artificially inseminate her and shat out two litters, and who is living off society, because she’s too stupid and lazy to get a job that doesn’t actually involve her vagina, is now pontificating on ObamaCare.

With a huge family, she said her medical expenses were exorbitant.

“No one should pay a dollar for health care,” she said. “It’s imparative [sic] and a very important law — like the driver’s license. A lot will change with me. I’m spending up to $2,000 a month on health care.”

However, even if Suleman didn’t have to spend a dime on doctor visits for her massive brood, she said she’d probably still have done her recent porn video.

“I would’ve made the same decision,” she said. “I have more bills to pay than just health care.”

She made the choice to shit out two litters of rugrats – INTENTIONALLY – knowing she had no job and no way of supporting them and likely counting on notoriety and attention and maybe a reality show to provide needed resources to raise said litters.

And she thinks she should receive health care for free. She believes that people who worked hard in college and medical school, who put up with grueling hours, exams and incredibly challenging academics, whose skills are in demand and relatively rare, because not everyone can do what they can do and maintain their sanity – she believes those people should be forced to give her those skills FOR FREE. She believes she deserves their hard work, experience, mind, blood, sweat and tears without having to”pay a dollar” while she shits out more kids and relies on others to pay for their upkeep.  And she believes the government should force you, me and every other taxpayer to pay for her tendency to create an entire generation of welfare recipients!

And “like the driver’s license” ???????

What the flying, blithering, vomiting fuck????

So thanks once again, SCOTUS, Zero and every felching piece of gonorrhea that has voted for him!  THIS IS WHAT WE ARE SUPPORTING.

Go ahead. Puke up the last vestiges of food you’ve had during the past 24 hours. I’ll wait.

 

 

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