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Tag Archives: feminists

Open letter to “feminists”

Dear Femtard Morons –

Yes, I call you this, and I’ve put “feminist” in quotes as the title of this post, implying you’re frauds, because you can hardly be compared to the strong, free, independent women who are your predecessors and who paved the way for women’s equal rights. The only thing you have in common with these heroes are your vaginas…

… and even that’s no longer a guarantee, given that there are those among you who were born with a penis, but have claimed your gender as their own. 

For the record, I don’t consider you simpering, triggered, vacuous, perpetually offended, pussy hat-wearing femtards, hiding behind your plumbing (or in some cases bathing in mea culpas for the crime of being born with male “privilege”) and eschewing actual accomplishments and hard work, feminists. 

You want to be considered strong without actually working to become so. 

You want recognition as equal to men without working to make your accomplishments equal to men’s. 

You think you’re entitled to the world without earning the world, because you own a twat (sometimes).

You think your perpetual offense entitles you to consideration and respect. 

And you think your faults should be revered, because you happen to have two X chromosomes, instead of working to overcome them. You use your ostensible “feminism” as an excuse for your failures, while demanding special treatment because of it. 

When you have purged the last vestiges of anything that could possibly chafe your fragile labia from society’s lexicon, entertainment venues, schools, and workplaces, you are compelled find new sources of butthurt, because otherwise you will no longer be able to quell your feelings of entitlement by shaming others into worshipping at the altar of your inadequacies. 

Well, I’m here to tell you I’ve stopped paying attention to your impotent squeaks a long time ago. 

When everything is offensive, nothing is, and you’ve ceased being relevant. 

Want proof?

Two words: Wonder Woman

Apparently, the paragon of feminine strength, virtue, and beauty is giving you whining shrews heartburn, because ARMPITS! She shaved her armpits!!! 

And because you blithering harpies decided that armpit hair is “feminist,” anything that doesn’t toe your arbitrary line doesn’t qualify and must be offensive!

“FAKE FEMINISM!” screeches someone whose Twitter avatar is a man. (Let’s hope this was sarcasm, but you just never know in this crazy world.)

“I just don’t buy the idea that #Wonderwoman would shave her armpits,” squeaks another alleged “man,” who calls himself @anothernewdad. 

Others weren’t “offended” per se, but had to air their armpit disagreement. 

“controversial hot take: i wish #WonderWoman had visible armpit hair. she was raised on an island of women w/no schick advertisements”

And this, dear feminists – both male and female – is why no one takes you seriously. 

I love Wonder Woman. As a kid, I wanted to be Wonder Woman. I wanted to be smart, dedicated, independent, and strong. I wanted to save the country again and again. And as a fan, I’m squealing with excitement about the Wonder Woman movie coming out this summer!

And you screeching morons are ruining it, much like you spoil everything that’s fun, everything that’s exciting, and everything that doesn’t comport with your crazed, unhinged view of the world – a view that tosses economics, science, common sense, decency, and logic under the bus in favor of faux indignation, abdication of personal responsibility, and sanction of anyone who dares to disagree with you as an oppressive member of the patriarchy. 

I don’t consider you part of my definition of feminism. I don’t like you. I hate the fact that you insist on sticking your protruding probosces into everything I’ve ever enjoyed and reinvent it into dull-witted, boring, vaginal superiority- and identity politics-filled garbage a la the all-femme “Ghostbusters.”

You want to invent brand new gender identities for yourselves? Be my guest. That’s the very definition of a free country. But don’t think for a moment you will force me to accept your self-identification as a coffee table, and don’t think for a moment I will take your self-righteous whining as a cue to suspend reality in favor of your twisted worldview. 

You want to color your unshaven pit hair in all the colors of the rainbow? Great! Go for it. But don’t you dare stick your unwashed, unshaven armpits in my face and demand I accept them and worship them as beautiful. 

I don’t care if you’re triggered. 

I don’t care if you’re offended. 

I don’t care if Diana Prince has clean shaven armpits in the Wonder Woman movie. She’s a fictional character. Get over it. 

I don’t care if you’re offended that Major Motoko Kusanagi won’t be Asian in the movie adaptation of “Ghost in the Shell.” She’s a fictional character with lots of “shells” as her cyborg bodies. She could be anyone. 

I don’t care about your precious feelings, just as you don’t care about the feelings of millions of people who don’t toe your ideological line and go as far as to marginalize their experiences and lives because they’re part of the whole cisheteropatriarchy garbage boogieman you have created and taught yourselves to despise. 

Stop trying to ruin my fun!

A pissed off woman 

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It’s Women’s Day, so why am I at work?

Today is International Women’s Day. March 8 is traditionally commemorated worldwide to honor women, mothers, daughters, grandmothers, etc. I remember giving my mom flowers on March 8 every year. Kind of like Mother’s Day, but on an international scale, and not just for mothers. And while it has definite socialist roots (it used to be called  International Working Women’s Day, ferpetessake!), it was always just a sweet holiday to me, in which we gave my mom carnations and took her out to a nice dinner. (Note to self: must remember to call mom today.)

Well, the perpetually offended uber-feminist brigade decided to hijack today to stamp their hooves and protest… something.

Much like the “Day Without Immigrants,” which appears to have gone unnoticed, and which resulted in some people who thought their political activism was more important than their jobs, getting shitcanned, this particular protest is meant “to highlight the economic power of women — as well as ongoing problems of discrimination and pay disparity.” To show how critical they are, women are being encouraged to take the day off from all work today and not to shop (except, of course at women and minority owned and small businesses). That’s all work, including unpaid labor.
I guess these cunt hat-sporting booger eaters won’t be taking care of the households and their children today either? Kids can fend for themselves, while mommy sits on the couch and impotently pumps her fist in the air, while sporting the trendy feminist scowl, for feminism – is that the way it works?

Once again, the virtue signalling socialist sow coalition is missing the economic point. Much like during the “Day Without Immigrants” protests, the economic impact will be negligible, other than to show them just how expendable they are.

Those same immigrants staging this protest and not buying anything, will purchase what they need tomorrow… or the next day. No harm, no foul. Any money “lost” from any sale today, will be made up tomorrow or the next day, because ultimately people need what they need.

I have no problem with people choosing where to shop based on anything they see fit. It’s their money. But to take  one day to virtue signal their support for small and women- and minority-owned businesses is an ineffective and economically stupid message to send.

Shutting down entire school districts and depriving children – including minority, low-income, and female ones – of a day’s worth of education doesn’t send the message that women are important. It says women are selfish twats, who think that their politics are more important than their commitment to teaching kids, who, with those kinds of role models, will likely grow up to be just as entitled and ignorant as these teachers, and forcing some parents, who probably aren’t privileged enough to afford skipping out on work and aren’t protected by teachers’ unions to take a day off.

And “striking from smiling” is literally the stupidest thing I’ve read in months! It honestly makes me want to throat punch the first scowling bitch face I see.

No, you screeching harpies, there’s no such thing as “emotional labor.” You will not get recognized or paid extra for being a nice person. But you might not get hired in the first place, if you go into an interview looking like someone shoved a live, venom-filled snake up your ass. Smiling is not the result of harassment. Smiling is polite. Smiling says, “No, I’m not a pernicious cunt wart, but a professional with whom someone would want to interact and possibly work.” Smiling is also psychologically healthy, which would go a long way toward explaining why these glowering hemorrhoids are so mentally unbalanced.

So, yes. I’m at work.

Why?

Because I love my job and my country, and because the work I do is more important than any political gripes I might have.

Because I understand that my value as an employee doesn’t depend on my plumbing, but rather on my performance.

Because manufactured outrage doesn’t trump my responsibilities.

Because I’m not selfish enough to force someone else to take on my duties while I vent my spleen at perceived slights, and I refuse to screw my co-workers.

Because refusing to work means refusing to get paid, and like many women, I’m not privileged enough to be able to afford that.

Because I refuse to demonstrate any kind of solidarity with turd-sucking, whining harridans who possess the economic acumen of  rotting stumps, but who believe they are entitled to MOAR respect and MOAR money despite their ignorance.

And because I prove how integral I am to the economy by actually doing a superior job, rather than shirking my duties.

Shutting down a school or business for one day will not prove your value. It may just do the opposite – much like it did with at least 100 immigrants, who failed to prove their impact on the economy, and lost their jobs in the process.

Things that make me want to nuke civilization from space

There are days.

There are days I literally want to shut down my computer and never come near the Internet again, and yet, I’m drawn to this collective psychosis we call “the world wide web,” like a moth to a flame… or one of those crackly lights that will kill the moth the moment it touches the bulb. Like a motorist who can’t help but rubberneck at a wreck on the side of the road, I had to open this. Immediately upon clicking on the link, I began to hit myself over the head with a metaphorical brick. WHY??

My recent article about ‘willy-cloning’ was greeted with such interest and hilarity on social media that the company responsible for the kits – Empire Labs, of Portland, Oregon – got in touch to ask if I fancied trying out a female version, the charmingly named ‘Clone a Pussy‘.

If that opening paragraph doesn’t make you die a little inside, this will.

The first thing to note is that Clone a Pussy does not create a model of the vagina itself – I can only imagine what sort of mess that would make with the moulding gel.

Instead, it creates a reasonably accurate copy of the vulva – the outside bits.

So while the male version can be put to, shall we say, practical use after construction, the female clone is for decorative purposes only.

audreyWho in the everblasting, rollerblading fuck would want to decorate their house with anything resembling a vagoo – inside or out? Sorry, but it’s not, in and of itself, an attractive body part. It’s pink. It’s hairy (unless you go the extra mile to de-fur). It’s oddly similar to Audrey 2 from “Little Shop of Horrors” sans teeth or blood lust.

“Oh, I know what this living room is missing! A set of labia vaguely slug-like in appearance! Perfect! Now let me just frame it and hang it riiiiiiight… over here.”

Yeahno, Cupcake! It ain’t pretty. It’s utilitarian. There’s certainly nothing embarrassing about it, but it ain’t art!

The second thing that made me want to hide under my desk today. Women paying for “expert vagina massages.”

They’re called gigolos, you daft bints. They’re getting you off for money. Calling it something different doesn’t change its nature.

Now, I’m all for the free market. Seriously. If a consenting adult wants to sell their… services for money to another consenting adult, more power to y’all! Have at it! But let’s not pretend it’s anything other than what it is. As I told She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named when I found out she was dancing at a strip club in West Virginia instead of working as a waitress, “You are an adult, and you can do with your body as you please, but if you’re going to be a whore, be an honest whore.”

Third thing that makes me throat punch a hippie, apparently women just can’t do science. Why? Because TEH FEELZ!

The syllabi for college-level STEM courses—science, technology, engineering, and mathematics—are “gendered” because they promote the idea that knowledge can be ascertained through reason. This is a masculine concept that hurts women’s feelings and makes it difficult for them to succeed.

That’s according to “Are STEM Syllabi Gendered? A Feminist Critical Discourse Analysis” of the STEM syllabi at one Midwestern university. The discourse was authored by the University of North Dakota’s Laura Parson, and published in The Qualitative Report earlier this year.

It presupposes that certain stylistic choices—command words like “will” and “must”—are inherently masculine and anti-woman, and then sets out to determine whether these words show up in STEM syllabi. Since a syllabus is not a negotiation, but rather, a set of instructions about how to succeed in a given class, they do indeed contain lots of commands.

Parson needs to stop embarrassing all women and take up a distinctly feminine feminist field that shall not force her pretty, dainty, weak self to conform to those pesky facts that chafe her tender labia. (If you notice a vagina theme here… Yeah, there is one.)

Try Kvetching 101, or the advanced “Taking Offense 300 – Strategies in Silencing the Opposition.”

Go with “Ruminations in Third-Wave Feminist Thought – The Best Three Minutes of Your Life,” or “Tears: Your Ultimate Weapon Against the CisWhitePatriarchy.”

But stay the fuck out of the sciences or anything else requiring logical thought. Please!

And then there’s this piece of spewed dreck onto a computer screen that makes the ages old claim that white people inherently racist and privileged.

If you’re like me, growing up, the word “Black” was always spoken of in whispers in your family. It was like we were saying something taboo. Why was that? Because it was taboo. We might feel more comfortable saying “African-American,” but not “Black.” The reason is that we were raised to believe that “colorblindness” was the ideal for whites. We were taught that we shouldn’t “see color.” And saying the word “Black” was an acknowledgment of the fact that we did “see color.”

Well, thank dog I’m nothing like you, hipster douche Omega male! I can and have said the word “black” throughout my childhood and my adulthood. I do recognize color – the fact that it exists and that some of us have more melanin in our skin than others. I just don’t give a fuck. There, I said it. Beyond recognizing that there are different hues to human beings, I just don’t care. My black friends (there, I said it, you emasculated coward) make me just as happy as my white friends. Know why? Because they’re wonderful human beings. So go fuck yourself. You don’t speak for me, and I would wager that aside from a few guilt-ridden about their own whiteness, braindead Snowflakes, you don’t speak for any other white people either. Moron.

Then there’s this bit from the Santa Clara County Office of Education

Did you know that mispronouncing a student’s name negates the identity of the student? This can lead to anxiety and resentment which, in turn, can hinder academic progress. Help us build positive school culture and promote respect to students and families.

Crying-Baby-PicturesWell, holy microaggressing fuck!

So the identity of the individual isn’t based on accomplishments, intelligence, intellectual curiosity, ability, or anything else related to those antediluvian norms. The identity of the individual is based entirely on what the kid’s parents might or might not have been smoking at the time when they decided to name their little precious North West or Chanda Leer.

As someone whose last name was consistently butchered by teachers in school, I understand the embarrassment when a teacher struggles to phonetically spell a foreign name, only to fail miserably. I get having to preemptively pronounce your name before the teacher stumbles like a drunken clown, making all the other kids giggle. But could we possibly get some damn perspective here, people?

Getting little Nevaeh’s or Reighleigh’s (no, really – that’s Riley) name wrong won’t traumatize her/him/it/whatever. It won’t destroy their identity, unless they’re being raised by weak-minded parents, who don’t teach them where their value comes from, which I suspect is the case for many of these poor kids, whose parents think naming them something “cool” and “different” will garner them respect without having to actually accomplish anything to earn it. Trying too hard to be original? Don’t. If your child has an ethnic name, be understanding. Recognize that not everyone is going to get it right from the first get-go, and that it’s not a slight against you, your ethnicity, or your child. In other words, stop being a special fucking snowflake!

Thank dog it’s Friday. I can avoid stupid on the weekends… I think.

 

I thought you wanted gender equality, ladies!

Guess what, femitards! Words have meaning, and gender equality means just that. It means your little groups and clubs get the same treatment as fraternities and other gender-specific organizations on campus.

Oh, that’s not what you wanted? Gosh, that’s too bad!

If Harvard is going to purge itself of sex-segregated institutions like fraternities, so too must they eliminate sororities and women’s-only clubs.

And the women don’t want that.

[…]

So if you must believe the male-only clubs encourage rape, then you must also accept the conclusion that these women’s clubs foster an environment where women are more likely to be rape victims. And if you think that is bullshit, you have to toss the entire study.

But coeds at Harvard don’t see it that way. They want to preserve their little clubs while telling the men to stop being so damned sexist.

Feminist_Rape_Protest_HarvardI said this a long time ago, and I’ll say it here. These women (and I use that word loosely, because some of them bear a strong resemblance to shrieking warthogs) don’t want equality. They don’t want to be treated the same as men, because if they were, they would weep crocodile tears and demand exemptions.

Oh, wait! They already do!

Students and alumni took their concerns to Harvard Yard and Twitter on Monday night, protesting the administration’s new policy and asking for women’s groups to be exempted. Many women expressed a need for safe spaces and wondered why they were being treated the same as the dominant and more-problematic male groups.

Why? Because equal treatment means just that. If Harvard is going to put an end to single-gender social clubs, it has to apply that policy equally. Or did Harvard not teach these… ladies… what equality means?

These women don’t want personal empowerment.

They don’t want equal treatment.

If they really wanted to stop rape on campus, they would demand the ability to carry a self defense tool such as a firearm at school.

But that’s not what they’re demanding, and they screech in outrage and clutch their collective pearls at the very suggestion.

Instead they want the forcible shutdown of any organization that consists of men, as if somehow that would stop a determined rapist.

They want to shut down male groups with the full force of the university standing behind them, because it provides the illusion that they somehow have power over men.

They miss the irony of having mommy and daddy college slapping the evil boys for them, even as they claim to be independent, strong feminists.

I hate the fact that they have hijacked the “feminist” label! No longer is a feminist a free-thinking, powerful, intelligent woman able to protect herself and her loved ones when needed and to advance her intellectual, career, and personal goals on a level playing field.

obey trigglyA scantily-dressed, 300-lb., unshaven, unwashed parody of a woman with rainbow hair, freakish piercings, and an attitude of entitlement has now become the avatar of feminism. An entitled Trigglypuff, demanding everyone else worship her inadequacies and hand her respect because of, not in spite of them.

Today’s feminist doesn’t want to become a stronger person. She is content with being a sad, miserable mediocrity and is empowered not by hard work, but by stomping on the rights of others like a rampaging buffalo.

She doesn’t measure achievement by how high she can climb using her own effort, but by how successful she is at keeping the competition down using force provided by others.

She wants to be handed things without bothering to earn them, she doesn’t respect the rights of others, and she wants to forcibly impose her views on them by limiting their right to speak and associate freely, as if her precious feelings obligate others to surrender their freedoms.

She doesn’t want equality. She wants special treatment, and she wants the world to advance her desires by turning reality on its head by affirming and genuflecting in front of her flaws and deficiencies, instead of working to overcome them.

Equality is parity. It’s fairness. It’s a level playing field.

It’s certainly not the erection of barriers to help the inadequate feel better about themselves.

Maybe it’s time these entitled Snowflakes learn that lesson.

Dear SJWs – STFU PLZ! KTHXBAI

shackYou know those graphics that sometimes circulate on social media showing you a small shack in the woods and asking you whether you would consider giving up the Internet and TV and living there for some amount of time if you were paid $1 million?

You know what makes that decision a whole lot easier and makes me jump up and down screaming “YES, PLEASE”?

The sheer volume of SJW Howler Monkey loonery I read on the Internet! It’s getting stupider and stupider out there, people. The bugs, bears, and other critters in the woods seem like Nirvana compared to the crazy that the Social Justice Whiner (bowel) movement has become!

Justice? These people wouldn’t know the meaning of the word if it bit them on their shriveled testicles!

The word “justice.” It’s supposed to mean fairness, impartiality, integrity, and lawfulness, right?

It’s supposed to promote equality and balance, right?

Since when did “social justice” become a catch-all phrase for mentally ill lunatics to parade their inadequacies and idiosyncrasies as claim checks to jobs, to respect, to special treatment, and to rewards?

It’s not enough to be gay. It’s not enough to be male or female, or even human! Now there’s “gender fluid,” “otherkin,” “gender nonconforming,” “neutrois,” “pangender,” and “two-spirit.”

There’s ability privilege, internalized racial oppression, microaggressions, (the morons at this Independent School Diversity Network to which I linked might want to learn that there’s no “d” in “privilege”) and other perceived infractions against those who are so desperate to be different, and so unskilled at anything other than being a bizarre caricature of humanity, they must invent identities just so they can gain the attention and drama they so fiercely crave.

Just this week, I’ve run across an article claiming that Ryan Reynolds as Dead Pool was “not gay enough.”

Another SJW cascade of excretory douchery claims that “linguistic discrimination” is real, and that we should stop judging people by the way they communicate. Because bad linguistic skills are simply “dialects,” and we must stop considering people less intelligent if they want to “axe you a question.”

This week I learned that singer Adele extolling the virtue of motherhood is somehow offensive to feminists.

I learned that a gay journalist advocating free speech is somehow a danger to women – such a danger, that they have to protest his mere presence on a college campus by smearing fake blood all over themselves.

I also learned that barring that same journalist from a free speech event entitled:  “From liberation to censorship: Does modern feminism have a problem with free speech?” is not at all ironic.

I learned that everything is offensive and everything is a trigger.

I learned that having only two options on standard forms – Male or Female – is a microaggression.

I learned that hating and even assaulting a human being if said human being happens to be white, straight, and male is just fine as long as you’re a cheerful, fugly feminist hosebeast.

cis male

I also learned that calling a woman “female” is somehow dehumanizing. female

It gets exhausting reading about all these new rules made up by the SJW Howler Monkeys in an effort to wrap themselves in emotional bubble wrap to avoid hurt feelings and overall reality.

No, you’re not allowed to ask someone’s gender.

No, you’re not allowed to judge people based on their skills or promote a meritocracy in which the best qualified people ought to get jobs.

No, you cannot show interest in someone by asking them where they’re from.

No, you cannot disregard color. You may not say so.

And dog forbid you dismiss concern trolls who want to bring up your microaggressions against the Special Snowflakes who feel they are entitled to special treatment, because inventing new identities helps mitigate their mediocrities!

Can’t they just find an island where they can hold their drum circles, circle jerks, and group fellatio sessions of anyone who identifies as a bedroom slipper?

Leave the rest of us misogynist, cis, dual gender, semi normal people who identify as humans to our neanderthal world!

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