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Category Archives: asshats

How to spot a fake news story (UPDATED)

There’s fake news, and there’s FAKE NEWS. There’s spin, and then there’s such complete imbecilic fuckery disguised as “reporting,” that the moment you read it, you should ridicule it and block the site. Anyone with a shred of knowledge or an inclination to check actual links in a story that claims to be “news,” should be able to discern fact from bullshit, but just in case, let me demonstrate.

A few days ago, some rabid cock weasel writing for some outfit named DC Memo, that claims to provide “news and commentary from our nation’s capital,” wrote an article titled, “Obama Using Top Secret iPad to Take Pics of Michelle.”

The title unequivocally claims that Barack Obama, who left office in January, is publicly using a classified device that he took from the government to take photos of his wife. This is a federal crime, and the headline is misleading and libelous. Let me explain.

After leaving the presidency, Barack Obama has been spotted using his favorite iPad to take photos of his wife while on a David Geffen-owned megayacht in Tahiti. But this may be no ordinary iPad. A government watchdog speculates that he may have taken the Top Secret version out of the Oval Office, a big no-no.

Note the language.

Barack Obama is using his favorite iPad to take photos of his wife, but it MAY be no ordinary iPad. This is already speculative. The idiot who wrote the piece links to Judicial Watch, claiming that the organization speculates Obama may have taken the TS version of the tablet out of the Oval when he left.

This is no longer fact, as claimed in the title, but conjecture. Further, if you click on the links provided as evidence for said claim, you will see this:

We can’t tell what iPad is being used by the former president, and the story postulates that this is a TS tablet that he somehow stole from the intelligence community and is now publicly using it to take photos of his wife.

But do you know what photo comes up when the story is linked on social media?


This. With the same libelous title.

Does this look like the photo was taken on a yacht, as the article claims? What kind of fucktard would wear a suit and tie on a yacht?

So what is this absurd claim based on?

The link to Judicial Watch claiming that the organization speculates he may have taken the iPad leads to the organization’s home page. I have done several different searches to find out what, if anything, Judicial Watch has written about an ostensibly missing presidential daily brief (PDB) tablet. I couldn’t find a thing. No speculation about any missing iPad. No accusation – not even an indirect one – about Obama having taken the tablet out of the White House.

Additionally, the TS tablet that contains the PDB is completely disabled and cannot in any way connect to any wi-fi, why in the world would Obama take a photo of her that he cannot share? Being a pretty tech savvy guy, one would think any device he would use to photograph his wife would be able to connect to the net, so that these photos can be shared.

The report claims there is a top secret iPad that went missing during the transition, and claims White House staffers were searching for it. There is no link to any reporting confirming this claim, and no actual source is named. Additionally, the fuckwit who wrote this travesty claims, “The iPad device that Obama is suspected to have taken with him into civilian life still has access to current Presidential Daily Briefs (PDBs). Trump associates believe this device may be giving the ex-president an “over the shoulder” view inside the secret workings of the Trump Administration.”

Now, I’m wondering how it is that a tablet that is not wi-fi enabled, and requires the intelligence community to load the information onto it in a secure location daily, which means the old data on it is deleted, can possibly contain information about the “secret workings of the Trump Administration.”

Here’s a clue, it can’t. The “journalistic” douche circus is so eager for a “gotcha” story against Obama, that he contradicts himself in froth flecked zeal to nail the former POTUS. And if you don’t think there’s a mechanism on this tablet that erases all the information on it automatically after a certain amount of time, in case the device gets accidentally lost or left behind, you’re as much of a moron as this “writer” is.

The National Archives, this chucklefuck claims, was also “unaware” of the existence of the iPad, because somehow he thinks the PDB staff can’t reuse the tablets and would hand them over to the National Archives instead.

“A member of the Obama team declined to comment for this report,” he concludes, as if somehow this is a condemnation against the former President.

Perhaps said member thought the story was so stupid, that he considered it to have been a waste of his time to even bother talking to this retardified butt penguin.

So let’s recap.

The title makes a definitive claim that Obama is committing a crime.

The story then speculates that Obama is committing a crime, based on the fact that he has a personal iPad and on spurious claims that there’s a missing presidential iPad that somehow, even though it’s not wi-fi enabled, is receiving current presidential daily briefs, and that Obama is reading them to get intel on the Trump administration… or something.

And to add insult to injury, it provides links that absolutely do not support said speculation and sets a default photo that when shared shows the President in a completely other situation, at another time, that has nothing to do with the original claim that he was using an iPad on a boat while on vacation to take photos of his wife.

This, boys and girls, is how you spot bullshit.

By the way, if you want to keep your sanity, do NOT read the comments at the bottom of the original story. The retardulous FAIL will make your brain bleed.

Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

UPDATE: Looks like the idiotarians removed that “story.” Maybe someone sent them my article? Hmmmmm?

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It’s Women’s Day, so why am I at work?

Today is International Women’s Day. March 8 is traditionally commemorated worldwide to honor women, mothers, daughters, grandmothers, etc. I remember giving my mom flowers on March 8 every year. Kind of like Mother’s Day, but on an international scale, and not just for mothers. And while it has definite socialist roots (it used to be called  International Working Women’s Day, ferpetessake!), it was always just a sweet holiday to me, in which we gave my mom carnations and took her out to a nice dinner. (Note to self: must remember to call mom today.)

Well, the perpetually offended uber-feminist brigade decided to hijack today to stamp their hooves and protest… something.

Much like the “Day Without Immigrants,” which appears to have gone unnoticed, and which resulted in some people who thought their political activism was more important than their jobs, getting shitcanned, this particular protest is meant “to highlight the economic power of women — as well as ongoing problems of discrimination and pay disparity.” To show how critical they are, women are being encouraged to take the day off from all work today and not to shop (except, of course at women and minority owned and small businesses). That’s all work, including unpaid labor.
I guess these cunt hat-sporting booger eaters won’t be taking care of the households and their children today either? Kids can fend for themselves, while mommy sits on the couch and impotently pumps her fist in the air, while sporting the trendy feminist scowl, for feminism – is that the way it works?

Once again, the virtue signalling socialist sow coalition is missing the economic point. Much like during the “Day Without Immigrants” protests, the economic impact will be negligible, other than to show them just how expendable they are.

Those same immigrants staging this protest and not buying anything, will purchase what they need tomorrow… or the next day. No harm, no foul. Any money “lost” from any sale today, will be made up tomorrow or the next day, because ultimately people need what they need.

I have no problem with people choosing where to shop based on anything they see fit. It’s their money. But to take  one day to virtue signal their support for small and women- and minority-owned businesses is an ineffective and economically stupid message to send.

Shutting down entire school districts and depriving children – including minority, low-income, and female ones – of a day’s worth of education doesn’t send the message that women are important. It says women are selfish twats, who think that their politics are more important than their commitment to teaching kids, who, with those kinds of role models, will likely grow up to be just as entitled and ignorant as these teachers, and forcing some parents, who probably aren’t privileged enough to afford skipping out on work and aren’t protected by teachers’ unions to take a day off.

And “striking from smiling” is literally the stupidest thing I’ve read in months! It honestly makes me want to throat punch the first scowling bitch face I see.

No, you screeching harpies, there’s no such thing as “emotional labor.” You will not get recognized or paid extra for being a nice person. But you might not get hired in the first place, if you go into an interview looking like someone shoved a live, venom-filled snake up your ass. Smiling is not the result of harassment. Smiling is polite. Smiling says, “No, I’m not a pernicious cunt wart, but a professional with whom someone would want to interact and possibly work.” Smiling is also psychologically healthy, which would go a long way toward explaining why these glowering hemorrhoids are so mentally unbalanced.

So, yes. I’m at work.

Why?

Because I love my job and my country, and because the work I do is more important than any political gripes I might have.

Because I understand that my value as an employee doesn’t depend on my plumbing, but rather on my performance.

Because manufactured outrage doesn’t trump my responsibilities.

Because I’m not selfish enough to force someone else to take on my duties while I vent my spleen at perceived slights, and I refuse to screw my co-workers.

Because refusing to work means refusing to get paid, and like many women, I’m not privileged enough to be able to afford that.

Because I refuse to demonstrate any kind of solidarity with turd-sucking, whining harridans who possess the economic acumen of  rotting stumps, but who believe they are entitled to MOAR respect and MOAR money despite their ignorance.

And because I prove how integral I am to the economy by actually doing a superior job, rather than shirking my duties.

Shutting down a school or business for one day will not prove your value. It may just do the opposite – much like it did with at least 100 immigrants, who failed to prove their impact on the economy, and lost their jobs in the process.

Vegan Crazy

You know that old joke about recognizing a vegan?

vegans

Well, you can now add “Don’t worry. They’ll crash into your chicken truck” to the punchline.

See, vegans can’t just be happy with living their life as they see fit. They’re filled with supercilious smugness about their lifestyle. They can’t be just happy with eating nothing but grass, wearing hemp, eschewing any article of clothing, accessory, or bath product that’s ever touched an animal – or was even in the vicinity of one – smelling like rancid BO and patchouli, and feeling superior about it. They’re miserable, overbearing busybodies, who obviously figure if they’re going to be miserable and unhinged, the whole world must be forced to join them.

Enter Judith Moriah Armstrong.

The investigation began when a truck driver told police he was traveling west on Hwy. 72 when a red four-door car hit the side of his truck. The driver said he initiated his brakes only to have the suspect vehicle slam into his truck once more – spinning in front of the truck in the process.

The truck driver pulled over and called 911 as the red car fled. He only had a basic description of the driver, a woman with shoulder length red hair. Had that been all that Madison County deputies had to work with, she might not have been as easy to find. However they reported that there was debris from the crash left on the side of the road – including her license plate.

You know what happened next, right?

Crazy bitch was tracked down to her house, refused to leave unless police secured a warrant (OK, that’s fine), but spoke with officers through a window and admitted to hitting the truck. Because it was a chicken truck, and she was a vegan.

I know you’ll be shocked to know that alcohol was involved, although, she claims she took a few shots when she got home, after she intentionally hit another person’s vehicle – twice – and then fled the scene.

Consider the irony here. Vegans reject the commodity status of animals, and renounce the use of animal products… because kindness to our fellow living beings or some such shit.

And yet, deranged ginger here intentionally hit the truck more than once, putting both the live creature operating the vehicle and the living beings in the back of said vehicle in mortal peril.

Guess the actual lives and well being of actual live creatures don’t matter when psychotic vegans decide their ideology must be obeyed at all costs.

I wonder if they’ll cater to her dietary preferences in jail.

How do you say “Crazy Fucking Bitch” in West African?

That would be more appropriate than “Nkechi Amare Diallo,” which is the new name of Rachel Dolezal, which apparently means “Gift of God” in West African.

The 39-year-old filed to adopt the West African moniker in Washington State … according to Daily Mail. Nkechi is short for Nkechinyere in the Nigerian language of Igbo, and translates to “gift of god.”

Her new last name, Diallo, comes from the Fula people of West Africa and means “bold” … which seems all too fitting for the artist formerly known as Rachel.

This lying psycho is the gift that keeps on giving. Like a bad case of the herp, she just continues her outbreaks of stupid – as if no one will figure out who she is when she applies for jobs with this new moniker!

She started a Change.org petition in October urging the TEDx organization to post one of her controversial speeches from April, 2016 at the University of Idaho. She listed the petition under Nkechi Diallo, never mentioning her birth name.

Instead of learning from the experience and doing some serious introspection, this mental case has decided to double down on the stupid. She’s not sorry. She doesn’t care that she lied to thousands, while faking the African American experience. She just wants to continue lying and pretending to be something she’s not.

crazy-bitchShe’s better off doing the porn she claims she was offered. I’m sure there are severely damaged freaks who are into spray tan crazy chick pretending to be black. It’s a limited market, but she’d be a big fish in a small pond.

Kind of like Lobster Porn Crazy McZucchini Tits.

Some decency, please!

I didn’t watch 45’s speech to the joint session of Congress last night, not because I was boycotting it, but because husband, buddy, and I went and grabbed some dinner. Service was a little slow, so by the time we got home, I saw the last maybe 15 minutes of it.

I won’t get into content too much. I heard him say “…based on our very strong and frank discussions,” NATO partners are beginning to meet their financial obligations. I shook my head a bit at him taking credit for this, considering former secretary Bob Gates in 2011 delivered a much more stringent message to our NATO allies before he left office about their defense burdens and the need to increase defense spending.

“The blunt reality is that there will be dwindling appetite and patience in the U.S. Congress, and in the American body politic writ large, to expend increasingly precious funds on behalf of nations that are apparently unwilling to devote the necessary resources … to be serious and capable partners in their own defense,” he said in an address to a think tank in Brussels.

The NATO defense burden of 2 percent of GDP is a benchmark. It’s a recommendation that only five partners so far are meeting – the United States, Estonia, Poland, Greece, and the UK – but it’s not a requirement, and most allies haven’t met that benchmark in decades, despite previous promises to do so.

But let’s put that aside, because that’s not what I want to discuss today. I’ve read the transcript. It’s surprisingly… presidential. Pleasantly so. I find myself agreeing with Van Jones – VAN FUCKING JONES – when he lauded Trump and conceded that “he became President of the United States in that moment – the moment he honored the widow of a slain Navy SEAL, who was in the audience last night. I agree with Van Jones. Mark this one in your calendars, boys and girls. It doesn’t happen often.

Look, I’m not one of those frothing jackasses who believes that losing a loved one in battle automatically affords one moral authority. (See: Cindy Sheehan) But I do believe being a Gold Star family member at the very least entitles one to some decency from one’s fellow humans.

Apparently, that’s just too much to ask for.

As Congress stood and applauded Carryn Owens for several minutes, and as she was moved to tears by the respect and love shown to her in that chamber last night, there were – as usual – a few hysterical, deranged, filthy colostomy bags who took it upon themselves to spew hate during a moment that, by all standards of decency should have been a bipartisan one.

schultzDebbie Wasserman-Schultz, who looked like someone was giving her an atomic wedgie laced with hot tar and ground glass during the impromptu tribute to Carryn Owens, and Keith Ellison, who sat frozen, as if he sharted and couldn’t move for fear of it seeping out of his pants, were two notable Democrats who refused to look at the widow, let alone stand up or applaud.

(Note: There’s been some controversy/doubt over whether Wasserman-Schultz and Ellison remained sitting, whether they stood initially, but didn’t stand the entire time, and whether the screen cap here is of the same moment. Snopes claims it’s false based on a screen shot from the White House webside, which shows both did stand at some point, but I did not see either one applaud, even as they turned toward Owens.)

Other usual suspects screeched on social media about Trump using a Gold Star widow for his “agenda,” because dog forbid the President of the United States acknowledge a woman who lost the man she loved just a few weeks ago in a military operation that is ultimately the responsibility of the Commander-in-Chief! It couldn’t possibly be genuine. It couldn’t possibly be heartfelt. Because TrumpHitler literally has no feelings!

griloBut one fucktastic cockbite went a step further and attacked Carryn Owens herself, claiming she was “clapping like an idiot,” because you know… she’s obviously too stupid to see that she’s being used by the Manchurian Cheeto. This is a woman who lost her husband a few weeks ago. She was applauding in recognition of her love. She was applauding in acknowledgment of the heartfelt condolences she was receiving from the floor. She was applauding in gratitude for the time she had with him and the appreciation and love she no doubt felt from all present.

But no. Dan Grilo, whose Twitter account has since gone the way of the dodo, and whose page on his employer’s site has also been deleted, decided to denigrate Carryn Owens as an idiot for not recognizing what he, Dan Grilo of the superior intellect, immediately saw – that Trump was using her!

The reaction from Twitter was swift and vicious.

Grilo tried to walk back his statement as a “poorly worded tweet” instead of acknowledging that he acted like a vicious, contemptible, vile, deranged fuck weasel. He tried to claim how “moved” he was by all the comments (moved like when one ingests too many Haribo sugar-free gummy bears), but in the end, he locked his account (Brave move, Danny boy! Viciously attack a Gold Star widow, and then run away.), and then deleted it. His profile page on his employer’s site has also been taken down.

Maybe Grilo wasn’t as bright as he thought he was. Maybe he thought “poorly worded” = noxious, mean-spirited, and cruel. Maybe he didn’t consider that his words had consequences. Or maybe… he’s just a dick.

He certainly forgot just how unforgiving the Internet is.

Reasons don’t matter. Actions do. There may be mitigating circumstances, but I can’t see one here.

How can one be so deranged, so unhinged, and so filled with noxious bile that they would publicly attack a grieving widow?

Yes, you can disagree with 45 all you want. You can dislike him. You can criticize his speech, his mannerisms, his policies, his background, his hair, his orange tint… whatever. That is your right as Americans.

But to behave like malevolent, steaming turd toward a fellow human being who has just experienced an agonizing, unimaginable loss, makes you an execrable bag of rancid effluvia. If you can’t even put your political biases aside long enough to refrain from senselessly and maliciously attacking a grieving woman, you might be a paunchy, odious troll, who was stupid enough to think that using his work headers on his Twitter account would amuse his employer.

If nothing else, Carryn Owens deserves some human decency. This hate-consumed bag of shit-covered dicks couldn’t even manage that.

And by the way, friends on the left, if you think this type of behavior will endear you to the rest of America, you obviously haven’t learned your lessons from this last election.

UPDATE: Looks like this dildo no longer has a job.

liberty

 

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