And you think you’re having a bad day?

dilbert

At least you’re not this guy, whose nutsack somehow got caught in an electrical grinder. Ambulance called. Dude wheeled out on a stretcher.

Couple of questions come to mind, including “Why was he using power tools nekkid?” and “Why in blue hell would he ever let a power tool so close to his giblets, that they get caught?”

Someday, he will laugh about this incident. Today is not that day.

And at least you’re not Vegas tourists enjoying a vacation while this douche pickle is zipping by.

On Wednesday, guests of Vegas’ popular Fremont Street Experience were shocked when an unknown liquid began showering down upon them. Alas, it was not rain, but a 15-year-old boy urinating as he rode the Slotzilla zipline above.

Slotzilla is a slot machine-themed zipline. Riders can choose the zipline for $25, which is 77 feet off the ground, or the ‘zoomline’ at 114 feet for $45. The zipline whisks riders over the pedestrian promenade.

Cazimere Ferguson, a vacationer from Hawaii, told Fox 5 Vegas that it was “a lot of liquid coming from above us, just showering us from head to toe, our back and top of the head dripping down. And we thought it was some sort of water, maybe some drinks or beer.”

Isn’t this just the typical Vegas tourist thing to say? “Dude! We thought it was beer raining from the sky, cuz VEGAS! So we, like, opened our mouths, but it was all salty and shit!”

And I’m fairly sure that your day is not “fell into a wood chipper and died on the first day of work” bad.

So, happy Friday, all!

15 responses

  1. This about sums up the state of our culture. Our future is the youth of today? We’re doomed.

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  2. After this week, I needed something to laugh at.🙂

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  3. Yeah. Dealing with trumanzee butt ostriches isn’t quite as bad as any of that.

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    1. Of course as soon as I posted I thought of more.

      Dealing with Trumpanzee butt ostriches is a qualitatively different kind of “bad” than these mishaps; the one involves an extreme degree of frustration at human stupidity, and the others involve blinding pain, or extreme disgust/anger at being pissed on.

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  4. I’m bettting young “Tim the Tool Man” had a lambskin buffing pad on that thing.

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  5. Ghost Rider 6

    All my life I’ve heard of people who would piss on your head and try to convince you it was raining. However, this is the nearest thing to documentation of that I’ve seen.

    Having a friend who is a urologist, I know of many worse things that have happened to men and their favorite toys than getting their ballsacks buffed, but you will thank me for not providing details.

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    1. Uhhhhhh…. I thank you for not providing the details. Seriously.

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      1. Ghost Rider 6

        Oh, Nicki, if you only knew. And more disturbing than the accidental injuries are the intentionally self-inflicted ones. There are some seriously fucked-up people out there.

        Liked by 1 person

    2. As do I. My sister being a nurse, I’ve heard things that made my my balls go into hiding. That was plenty enough.

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  6. Did tree chipper boy’s co-workers all have middle names of “The”? You know, Vinnie The Squirrel, Eddie The Fish, Tony The Hammer …

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Then there was the guy who showed up at the emergency room because he needed help removing the light bulb from his rectum ………

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    1. I’m sure he lite up the ER with suprise at his predicament.

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  8. “Someday, he will laugh about this incident. Today is not that day.”

    Indeed. The question is, will he laugh in soprano or not? 😛

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  9. Ghost Rider 6

    Also, as someone once said, “The only halfway good thing about shooting your dick off is that no matter what happens in the future, you can always say, ‘Well, it’s not as bad as the time I shot my dick off.'”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s a certainty that many don’t mind shooting their mouths off.

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