Hey, Snowflake! Wide Airline Seats to Accommodate Your Extra-Large Arse are NOT a Human Right!

I hate air travel. I really do. I realize it’s sometimes necessary to cram myself into a gigantic metal tube with hundreds of my closest friends and feast on stale pretzels and flat soda, while it flies at a high rate of speed somewhere other than where I started, but I hate it. I hate the crowds, and the sometimes less than clean other passengers. I hate the TSA gropage (although, I do have TSA Pre, so that part of it is mostly painless nowadays). I hate the stale, recycled air and the fact that nearly every time I fly, I wind up with someone’s respiratory crud, and if not that, I usually get some kind of skin rash from the seat, which is always an unmitigated joy.

Flying is not fun.

That said, it appears someone with Special Snowflake Syndrome (SSS) has decided to invent another human right – the basic right to room on a plane. Christopher Elliott is a travel journalist and co-founder of something called Travelers United, whose mission is to “advocate in Washington, DC for all travelers. We educate travelers on their travel rights and we educate lawmakers and regulators on consumer issues.”

I will say this: anytime someone invents a group to “advocate in Washington, DC” about a right they just invented, I begin to worry, because that generally means that they want legisleeches to do something about said invented right that has allegedly been violated by a private company – a company no one compels you to use at the point of a gun – and with whom you deal willingly by paying money for their service. As soon as someone claims an invented right has been violated, politicians eager to be seen as doing something for their constituents spring into action to remedy said alleged violation. It’s the “doing something” that worries me, because generally, in their frothing zeal to look responsive, they fail to rationally think through the legislation they cram through the legislature, and wind up violating ACTUAL rights – not the right invented by the Special Snowflake, who desperately needs an education on the nature of a right. In this case, the Special Snowflake and crew want the government to regulate the minimum legroom the airline can give passengers in economy class.

Elliott notes that the average economy-class seat amount of passenger legroom, has declined over the years, from about 35 inches in the 1970s to about 31 inches today. Seat width has declined too, from around a high of 20 inches back in the 1980s to about 17-18 inches, according to USA Today.

OK, I get it. It’s uncomfortable. It sucks. Half the time, I spend my flight trying to jam myself into the corner of my seat to avoid the oversized bulk of adipose tissue that overflows into my seat from my uber large neighbor. But you know what I do if I really feel that a service doesn’t live up to my expectations? I certainly don’t try to get Congress involved! I either choose not to fly, and choose another mode of transportation, purchase an upgrade to a more comfortable seat, or I SUCK IT UP! I certainly don’t invent a right and then try to force Congress to impose an obligation on another private entity to help me exercise it!

Look up the difference between positive and negative rights, Snowflake, and then shut your yap.

You pay for a seat on a mode of transportation. It does not have to be comfortable. It just has to be a seat. If you don’t like it, don’t fly.

You know what happens when someone invents a right and then gets Congress involved? Well, let me smartsplain it to your dumb ass.

  1. You invent the right to more legroom on a plane.
  2. You take said invention to Congress, and Congress passes a law that obligates airline companies to give you said room.
  3. Airplane manufacturers start making wider seats with more legroom, thereby allowing fewer passengers aboard.
  4. Airline loses profits due to fewer passengers, charges your entitled ass more money to sit in a crappy economy seat.
  5. You start complaining about higher airline prices, invent right to lower prices.
  6. You take said invented right to Congress, and Congress passes a law to cap prices.
  7. Lower profits force airlines to cut jobs.
  8. And so on…

Get it yet? You have the right to travel. You have no right to force someone else to make that travel pleasant or comfortable.

You have the right to purchase a ticket on a specific airline. If said airline doesn’t meet your expectations, you have the right to take your business elsewhere. You don’t have the right to force another entity to conform to your subjective expectations at the point of a government gun.

You have the right to bitch and moan about your experience. Hell, I do so quite a bit when I experience crappy customer service. And miraculously, you know what happens? The provider of said crappy service normally does everything in its power to fix it, because the last thing it needs is to lose business to bad publicity.

And that works a whole lot better than running crying to the nanny state, because someone didn’t give you the warm fuzzy you think you deserve.

15 responses

  1. Bravo. I haven’t been on a plane in years. I intend to keep it that way as long as possible.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Exactly right. One’s right to be morbidly obese does not translate into a burden on my part. You spill your body into my seat….you’ve burdened me, and should have bought two seats. In an age where we have [at least RyanAir] charging or considering charging for carry-on baggage….there’s zero reason for a passenger to take me space and weight than the average/mean passenger, at the same cost…at least when said passenger cannot fit into a single, paid seat.

    As a fairly frequent air traveller…..the only thing that pisses me off more, are those who carry-on the largest roller bag known to man, plus 2 or 3 additional carry-ons…and think that they can move my bag to accommodate their luggage.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. just found your blog a short time ago. great point of view. thank you for your service to America. You are a hero in my book. Good for your new Marine, another patriotic hero. My youngest son is a Sailor station out of Virginia.

    My wife and i were married in Las Vegas in 1992. Just the two of us. Her first, my second. It was in a small church, intimate and very special.

    I am a somewhat conservative libertarian. I stand firmly on the Constitution and especially on the Bill of Rights, which only spell out some of our freedoms, they do not grant them, as I am sure you know.

    I will stop in as often as I can to keep tabs on the 2 of you and look forward to your thoughts on various topics,especially as they relate to the abuse of power by those in authority.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for stopping by. Great to have you here.🙂

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  4. Seems as though Special Snowflake has never had one of those golden opportunities to use city buses for daily commutes, or commuter rail lines, either. Loads of fun, especially in winter when the guy sitting behind you coughs all over you for an hour and a half on the way home, and you get the Joy of Bronchitis out of it.
    And that doesn’t count those wonderful days of the Frozen Chosen waiting at the bus stop to go home for at least an hour and a half in the bitter cold, and when the bus finally does show up, your feet have gone numb, never mind wondering if the other frozen soul waiting at the bus stop is just cold or means to mug you.
    So glad I retired.

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  5. Thanks to the military… I never want to fly… EVER AGAIN

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  6. Well said… I have three more months of travel then if I ever get on another plane it will be too soon! I’m old enough to remember free beer, and them charging for the movies. Sigh… AND getting a full meal between DC and Chicago! Thankfully I’ve got enough miles I usually manage to get upgrades, but when I don’t, I just deal with it. Life isn’t, nor has it ever been fair, and ‘catering’ to asshats like that doesn’t bode well for airline prices! Profits are somewhere in the neighborhood of $.05-.06/seat mile now.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Nicki, I wish for once you’d tell us how you really feel !!!😉

    OC

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  8. I try to avoid flying when ever possible, at least commercial. It’s almost always a miserable experience and I am glad to be off as soon as it lands. I have had two great flight, Once when I was bumped up to first class from England back to the US, and once when I flew in a C-5.

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    1. I hate flying, but with my job it’s unavoidable. I think the best flights I’ve had have been with Lufthansa and British Airways. Turkish Airways was pretty fantastic as well.

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  9. Kinda like what our “right to health care” has done to our medical system.

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  10. Ahhh fuck it. Just get some of the old cattle cars they used to cram us into, throw some wings and engines on’em and then “HAPPY FLYING MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!”

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  11. I have left the notion of rights behind, because it does not appear to coincide with reality. One can talk about positive and negative rights and positive rights until one is blue in the face, but it won’t improve our situation.

    See these:
    http://strike-the-root.com/life-without-rights
    http://strike-the-root.com/i-dont-have-rights-nor-do-i-want-any

    Strangely, since putting these out there, I haven’t found many people willing to discuss it. I suppose the notion scares people.

    As to flying, I no longer do so. If I can’t get there driving, I don’t want to go. I realize this is a temporary fix. When the checkpoints get ubiquitous, it is time for war.

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    1. Giving up is how we lose. Rights exist. They exist regardless of whether people recognize them or not. We have them, regardless of whether the government recognizes them or not. Their refusal to acknowledge reality doesn’t negate its existence.

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  12. As a confirmed “Wide Load”, of 6′-2″, myself, I have flown recently and noted the seats narrower and legroom shorter. You have to draw lots to see who gets the armrest and who hunches forward with shoulders tucked in to be polite. That said, if I were on an aircraft with you, I would not sit beside you and slowly collapse into you like a giant mound of silly putty. I might sit behind you,, pass gas and kick your seat, all the way from Eastern Europe. It’s not just my Right, but my Responsibility as a fellow air-traveler.😛

    Liked by 1 person

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