Monthly Archives: November, 2008

Try saying “NO,” you morons!

I don’t understand some parents.  They can’t seem to exercise any kind of control over their kids.  They want to be their children’s buddies, pals and friends, but refuse to take any kind of responsibility for their fetid crotchfruit.  It’s like they bore it, and now they don’t know how to control it.  They think it’s en vogue to shun discipline and instill in their kids this irritating ennui that makes them think they’re better, more deserving and more special than others by virtue of being whining emo douchebags.

I’m sick and tired of stupid parents who just can’t say, “NO!”  You see them in stores all the time.  Instead of taking control of their whining offspring, they grab whatever the rotten midget is whining about and let them have it – just to shut them up!  That’s the kind of kid that grows up thinking they’ve got an entitlement to be happy – even if it’s at others’ expense!

That literally evokes visceral rage in me!  Makes me want to grab the parent by the scruff of the neck and take them to the closest doctor who will tear out their ovaries / testicles with a rusty fork to ensure they never again produce another spoiled rotten piece of detritus.  We can’t say “NO” to our children, so we will demand that the rest of the world alter their reality to our inability to parent correctly.

In a season that inspires earnest letters about toys, one notable
batch is being sent not by kids to Santa’s workshop but by parents to
the executive suites of real-world toy makers.

The message: Please, in these days of economic angst, cut back on marketing your products directly to our children.

letter-writing initiative was launched by the Boston-based Campaign for
a Commercial-Free Childhood, which says roughly 1,400 of its members
and supporters have contacted 24 leading toy companies and retailers to
express concern about ads aimed at kids.

“Unfortunately, I will
not be able to purchase many of the toys that my sons have asked for;
we simply don’t have the money,” wrote Todd Helmkamp of Hudson, Ind.
“By bombarding them with advertisements … you are placing parents
like me in the unenviable position of having to tell our children that
we can’t afford the toys you promote.”

Here’s a novel idea, Todd.  Grow some balls – you know those things you used once to create your precious little self entitled monster who thinks he ought to get whatever the hell he wants just because they happen to show it on his TV-sitter – and tell your kid he won’t be getting that $500 gaming system for Christmas!  “Sorry, little dude.  You are not entitled to receiving everything that happens to be advertised!”  There.  That wasn’t so difficult, was it?  Better yet, Todd.  Turn of the friggin’ TV.  Do something with your kids that teaches them about things other than material.  Spend some time with them.  Teach them about the work – about the beautiful things that exist in it outside the idiot box.  Maybe then your precious little Punkin won’t demand every stupid thing it happens to see in advertisements!

But no.  Todd and his ilk would rather demand that businesses such as toy companies and broadcast outlets quit making profits, because they’re too stupid or spineless to use that little one-syllable word to their kids.  I think they do it to avoid the obvious guilt of being shitty parents.  After all, if you can’t spend time with your children, find out about their day, play with them, read to them, and treat them like they’re important to your life, just BUY them shit!  That’ll assuage your guilty conscience, asshats!


Canadians shun economic plan because it’s just not socialist enough

Apparently cutting spending and selling off assets as a way to reduce the deficit is a bad thing, according to the Canucks.  Why?  It’s just not socialist enough.

Harper government is chopping spending and selling assets as part of a
plan it acknowledges may not balance the books – but could trigger an
early election.

All three opposition parties immediately rejected the mid-term
economic statement because it is bereft of a stimulus package to rescue
the stumbling economy.

There are just not enough giveaways in this package.  Sorry, dude.  We need to get rid of you get find someone who is willing to give away billions belonging to the taxpayers.  Otherwise, we’ll never see reelection.

political landmine inserted into the update, which would have the
Tories deny all parties access to $27 million in public subsidies, is
also unacceptable to opposition parties.

With the Tories flush with cash, the opposition parties say the
surprise measure is designed to cripple their ability to carry on
operations and fight elections in the future.

We don’t like the plan because we will no longer get taxpayer subsidies of our reelection campaigns, and that sucks!

Is it me, or is there something seriously obscene about forcing the taxpayers to pay for your bid for power, which you will then use to bludgeon their earnings away from them to help yourself get reelected? 

And while the taxpayer funding of political parties represents only a small percentage of the proposed spending increases, I would think this kind of twisted shit would be the FIRST to go!  It’s a start!  Personally, I hate the fact that even one tenth of a penny of my earnings goes to helping nitwits in Washington get reelected!  The thought is repugnant to me that they’re using MY earnings to gain power over me and mine!

Canada is headed into a technical recession and these assholes are worried about their reelection booty???  My God!  Why aren’t Canadians enraged over this?

Oh, I forgot.  They’re Canadian.

“Who takes a loaded gun into a toy store”

A better question to ask would be, “who uses a loaded gun to shoot a fellow thug in a toy store?”

The answer would be:  someone who has no respect for human life and who makes crime part of his daily routine.

Two people are dead in a Black Friday shooting at a crowded Toys “R” Us in Palm Desert, Calif.

City Councilman Jim Ferguson says police have told him that the victims were two men with handguns who shot each other.

The councilman says his question is: who takes a loaded gun into a
toy store. And his answer is: “I doubt it was the casual holiday
shopper.” Authorities are still investigating but indicate the shooting
may have been gang related.

I take my loaded gun into a toy store, and everywhere else it’s legal, Councilman.  What I DON’T do is use it in a criminal manner.  I see that once again this type of incident will be used to vilify the law-abiding gun owner.  And until those in power learn to ask the right questions and direct their ire where it belongs – not at those who legally exercise their rights, but at those who abuse those rights and commit criminal acts – we’re going to continue seeing calls for more control from the gun banner crowd. 

After all, this type of incident represents their golden opportunity to push their agenda.  And don’t think for a moment that the opportunistic swine won’t take advantage of it!

Everyone have a good Turkey Day?

I hope so.  I was in a tryptophan coma for half the day.  Fell asleep at 1830, and didn’t wake up until almost 0700 today.  Way to spend Thanksgiving with family… drunk on wine and passed out.

Now that everyone is emerging from the food catatonia, thought I’d share the scary picture of the day… This is what the Redhead looks like when he’s faced with a large piece of apple pie.

And don’t even MENTION chocolate in his presence!

I’m going to wallow in self-flagellating guilt over the atrocities people with no relation to myself perpetuated against the Native Americans and thank the Pagan gods that MY people were enslaved somewhere in Egypt by the northern Africans.  What’s a little smallpox-covered blanket compared to centuries of forced pyramid building, after all?


Some terrific news!

For a couple of months now, my bro Misha has been diligently searching for a job.  I’ve been helping as much as I could, but my input was limited given the distance between us.  Nonetheless, I got an email from Mish this morning, and he is, in his own words, no longer amongst the woefully unemployed.

No, there will not be a pouting Misha standing in a bread line or living in a cardboard box or even one of those grates out of which you can see hot air emanating on a cold day.

I didn’t want to break the news on my blog until he broke the news on his, and I’m thrilled to say I no longer have to sacrifice chickens or rodents in my cubicle at work.  I can now put away the ceremonial knives and scented candles!

Congrats, Mish!  I had faith.  I knew you could do it!

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